Why God doesn't talk to us anymore: how to grind under the influence
by CorageousCockadoodle
Summary: Mea culos, mea culos, mea maxima culos. Confiteor Deo omnipotenti.


It was only a matter of time before Courage reached the train. After all, the former masked feline and her cotton candy-furred girlfriend had became a vigilante conductor couple. But little did the lavender dog know, this was their bi-weekly maryjane sexynight. And when he non pepis-ply came through the door, _bi_ had suddenly became the emphasis of their figurative playtime.

"AYYYYYYY HOMECOWWWWWWW~" Bunny hic'd, having brought in a six-pack of bud lite that she'd went through at least half of. "lmao geddit homecow cuz liek ur a cowardly dog and dawg lol" Kitty smacked her with a Sarah Palin mask, for she knew they weren't the only ones in the room with a kink for masks. That one night she wore her Darth Vador suit with a Starfleet-shaped strap-on after Bunny left Mad Dog was the bang of their lives, but that was another story in the making.

"greetings loved ones" courage ejackulated in a Snoop Dogg voice, but by ejacunating I mean saying it's also a saying word not just vag-hider word. Kitty eyed him smokey-eyed, which I guess was accurate since she was huffing up her 10th blunt. "id be surprised but ur in lesbians so nah. okay so how many people saying ur-just-friends have you fight lately?"

"to many fuckers to count" Kitty hiss, nibbling at her lovemate with some bites on the neck and some other foreplay stuff the autgher's too laze to describe. "but il fuck u bunny now will i" "yea but we fucked at least to *hicv* 3 times in one hour" bunny added as she winked wonked at kittey and Courage's Courageous Cockadoodledoo.

If his Courageous Cockadoodledoo had anything to say, it'd probably be about how bunny's ex was mad that he doesn't have the meat to get any. Or about how dayum hard he was getting, but that's beside the titillated point.

So Courage eyed a cigar and the two bud lights that were left over and as his former nemisis wiggled out her being-felt-up kitty-clitty, he sniffed the former and started chewing on it like his favorite non-arousing bone (saving htat for the climax). But as we all know now because I'm Telling you at this very moment dogs can get 200% higher than the Eiffel Tower at this kinda shit so he was in 7th heaven and masagging Bunnys buns by the time he snuffed that shit. Not wanting to waste the rest of the burrs, kitty poured the two other cans all over their fur-clad selves, the inebriated lube helpin things get more hot and steamy like the inside of that vdarth vader cosplay because damn that must have been hot in more ways than just a sweaty costume.

One clit, two clit, red cock, no blue balls. One clam on bunny's leg, the other grinding against the traint's shiftystick that usually starts the train or something how to trains work just be thankful the author can write a better smut than 50 shades of grey artistic liscense yoooo. The train engine roared as loud as they were gunno be by the end of this steamy night, because everyone loves engine-revving foreshadowing. Bunny licked her gfs kittytitties and Couraged tongue-smooched a certain feline, kitty gracefully werkin down his lavender bod before nibbling at his pinky winky throobin watery celery stick.

The fellatio was niiiice as far as Courage could tell, that rough tounge like an entire angle cake smothered on his furry privates, but before he could cum he whispered "sshhhhh kitty weh haven't gott to the good part yet.' So like a gentledog he asked which one of em liked getting eaten up and which one wanted the Corageous Cockadoodle rather than just opting for doggystyle because he ain't gunna give bullshit up the ass if they don't want it okay consent is sexy k thank you very much this might be crack but even the aouthor of this atrocity isn't making him a You Know What.

Anyways, between various drunk hiccups, the occasional hallucination, and the train starting to run as a result of Bunny's fluffy wet pelvis, the bunny in question opted for the eatout while Kitty got the D, Courage pumping his purple cabbagepach inside her feline cavern as he gave Bunny a helping hand. Their ecstatic howls and yowls and whatever-noises-bunnies-make moans heaved and pumped and humped and grinded and heffalumped in the coal-grizzled air, the train engine fumes adding to their euphoric highness and lack of influence. Their night of bliss, consensually switching positions to shake things up as Corageous Cock and tittykitty and fluffbuns and kittyclitty and Bunny's cotton candy clit alike heated and wetted like a tut-tut-it-looks-like-rain Windsday flood. heavy drugged red eyes batted and butterfly kissed in their symphony of putty cat slamming rabbit-fucking goodness and scream a la cremes and dreams come true.

And then they came. At the same time, celery-throbbing and clam-clapping alike. Because all three were in love and they knew it. Even Katz knew it, which was why he put his plans aside for the night as well as his much less Courageous Cockadoodle because it was pretty damn obvs that he wouldn't get some with two bangin chicks. And we all know that with a little bit of faith, dust, and pixie dust, their polyamorous dreams came true as the train halted to a stop at the living room residing at the formerly quiet house withing the Middle of Nowhere, conveniently running over Eustice.

"ooo is that me courage in there? by the sound of it he's all grown up :'D" Muriel kindly cooed with a suggestive wink as the ajar door of the ruined train propped itself open, hiding her absolute joy that her husband of how-fucking-old-are-they-probably-as-old-as-an-Elder-God years and his shrivling cabbagehack were now no more, replaced by two hnnngablebly bangin ladies because c'mon, what kind of old Scottish woman doesn't resort to the furry fandom when you have to deal with that?

with a warm smile and heavy pants, bunny mumbled "you two are _much_ better than Mad Dog. so small, cock ain't Corageous. Untz~" All ears heard including Muriel, but no one cared. They were all in on it. Their night of bliss was at a calming end, but there would be more to come. Literally.


End file.
